1. If men are to begin to share in the “work of love” we will have to change our ways of loving them. This means, among other things, that we cease praising and being grateful to the fathers of our children when they take some partial share in their care and nurture. (No woman is considered “special” because she carries out her responsibilities as a parent; not to do so is considered a social crime.) It also means that we cease treating men as if their egos were of eggshell, or as if the preservation of a masculine ego at the expense of an equal relationship were even desirable. It means that we begin to expect of men, as we do of women, that they can behave as our equals without being applauded for it or singled out as “exceptional”; and that we refuse them the traditional separation between “love” and “work”.

    They will not, for a long time, see this as a new form of love. We will be told we are acting and speaking out of hatred; that we are becoming “like them”; that they will perish emotionally without our constant care and attention. But through centuries of suckling men emotionally at our breasts we have also been told that we were polluted, devouring, domineering, masochistic, harpies, bitches, dykes, and whores. We are slowly learning to discredit these recitals, including the one that begins, “Mothers are more real than other women.”

    – Adrienne Rich, Of Woman Born: Motherhood as Experience and Institution, Tenth Anniversary Edition (Virago Press, 1992, first published 1976), p216

    1 year ago  /  158 notes  / 

    1. kaitg reblogged this from heteroboremative
    2. heteroboremative reblogged this from radtransfem
    3. 2cute2careaboutu reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    4. trechsel reblogged this from aiexe
    5. aiexe reblogged this from radtransfem
    6. thesunshineinyourheart reblogged this from in-my-blood-my-holy-wine
    7. in-my-blood-my-holy-wine reblogged this from radtransfem
    8. waking-up-to-worth reblogged this from radtransfem
    9. pramygue reblogged this from radtransfem
    10. qqueensansa reblogged this from tsuizui
    11. sextsash reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    12. escapingnormalidad reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    13. truthhappens reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    14. theplaguekilledmany reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    15. ive-still-got-time reblogged this from feministperfectionist
    16. twobirdlegs reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    17. stainedlikeme reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    18. joinedtoday reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    19. mag-netic reblogged this from ineverlearnedtostay
    20. ineverlearnedtostay reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    21. emnope reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    22. fan-in-pink reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    23. vvaddi reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    24. kitten-smurf reblogged this from loulouchanel
    25. orangekicksass reblogged this from theyellowbrickroad
    26. notqt reblogged this from tsuizui