1. [TW] “What rape is not” - and a suggested new crime

    After reading Cath Elliott’s excellent summary of what Rape Is Not, I’ve just about had it. It’s time for a new crime. It’s called rapemindedness and it is the crime of either:

    a) Deliberately acting in such a way as to make somebody else feel sexually violated

    b) Not giving a shit about whether or not the way you act will make somebody else feel sexually violated

    with the caveat that:

    c) If someone sexually violates a person, that someone is automatically guilty of rapemindedness, because sexual violation isn’t something that happens like, “whoops!”

    Because it is either/or, the defence “I didn’t do it on purpose” is not valid. Neither is, “but she said yes in the end”. Neither is the perpetrator lying about either of those things, because neither of them changes the fact that the perpetrator was rapeminded and willing to violate. If she actually enjoyed it, I’m glad to hear she didn’t feel violated but that doesn’t change the fact that the perpetrator was a rapeminded little shit.

    And if a perpetrator sexually violates somebody, no defence is acceptable. Not even, “I definitely didn’t want to violate,” because that is bullshit. I manage not to mug people on a regular basis who I definitely don’t want to mug, and so can you. (Incidentally, I also manage to not be “falsely accused” of mugging.)

    I achieve these amazing feats because I am not confused by the difference between exchanging gifts with someone and mugging them. Others would be advised to aspire to a similar lack of confusion between violation and sex despite the general conflation of the two.

    The key diagnostic criterion for a perpetrator’s rapemindedness is that a person says, “I feel/felt sexually violated by [perpetrator]” (I hope we all remember Twisty’s wacky consent scheme?). The secondary diagonistic criterion is that a perpetrator is observed behaving in a rapeminded way.

    Note that in none of these definitions is “consent” relevant. When a person is behaving in a rapeminded way, they don’t care about consent. In order for a person not to be behaving in a rapeminded way, they have a responsibility equal to the social power they possess to care about and bring about a state of consensuality in their sexual relations.

    2 years ago  /  27 notes  / 

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